Ex-Boyfriends Need To Be Shipped To Pluto

So the other day my friend and I are getting all decked and dolled for this really underground, really experimental, really hip party. I'm downplaying my excitement with a cropped t-shirt and black pants like I'm way too cool to try any harder. My hair is held to the side in a high and messy ponytail and I'm putting on lipstick while my iPhone's blasting Keke Palmer, when a text from our mutual friend comes through. Uh oh. Apparently, my friend's crazy-stalker-emotionally-unstable-compulsive-lying-weird-internet-persona-type-ex has invited himself to the said event according to Facebook. He might be there.

My friend and I exchange devastated looks. I roll my eyes and hers follow. I say, "this isn't even fair, he's not my crazy ex-boyfriend. Plus, he wasn't even hot to be worth any of this." She says nothing. I realize it's not her fault that he turned out to be evil and start to feel bad. "We can't live like this." But tissue to lipstick, hair back down, and pants off. I stick a toothbrush in my mouth and get ready for bed. By this time, it's nearly midnight. Too early to sleep but too late to reconsider. Ex-boyfriends need to be shipped to Pluto. Ugh.

bio

Hello, my name is Liz Una Kim. 

I was born in Montreal, Canada, but grew up in the suburbs of Korea and (mostly) Southern California. Spent my adolescent years in bad outfits and cars, reading Nancy Drew. Wish I could say I used to dream about fashion magazines under satin bed sheets with a flashlight at night, but I didn’t — I slept like a baby. My extracurricular time was split between my pet hamster and banging my head on the piano to indulge my parents’ fantasies of me being brilliant.

I studied Media, Culture, and Communication at New York University, where I wrote pretty unoriginal essays on Barthes, Sontag, and Vogue editorials and mastered nightlife. Meanwhile, I pursued my interests in magazine publishing at Vanity Fair and The New Yorker. Now BuzzFeed pays for the cocktails (where I do Marketing things)! 

I have a delicate spot for R&B, rock'n'roll, documentaries, urban culture, German Shepherds, film photography, cured meats, memoirs, and fashion. My most preferred styles of writing are creative nonfiction and sloppy text messages.

The purpose of this blog is personal documentation, but if it happens to inspire others... AWESOME!!! I do take on freelance work and consulting on a project-to-project basis, feel free to contact me. Thanks for reading! Xx

contact

LizUnaKim [at] gmail [dot] com

Social sometimes.
Booty calls always appreciated.

press

"Liz is the best."

— Mrs. Kim

"... and the worst."
— Ujin Kim

"Girrrl got mad personality and rhythm!"
— random dude at party